Digging Deep…

Dig, Dig, Dig

Moon in Pisces

Yvaine from the film Stardust

Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. Dale Carnegie

There is nothing much wrong with my life, I’m happy enough, got food on the table, roof over my head, a steady job and I have exciting projects on the go with my website, this blog, I get on great with my kids, family and overall nothing is really stressing me out… then I slammed my foot into a door and broke my little toe – clumsy girly (I don’t have any gory pics)

But there’s a restlessness, a sadness and a deep loss of connection, to whom/what or how I don’t really know; so I’m going to have to dig a bit deeper, to find out what the hell is going on Continue reading

Schöne Marlene

Marlene Dietrich by Photographer Don English 1932 ~Shanghai Express

Marlene Dietrich ~  Dec 27th 1901 – May 6th 1992   Wiki Article

This has to be the ultimate diva for me, she was an actress and singer  I won’t go into her life history as it’s documented very well already. I want to tell you what songs I like and why I like her

Songs
My favourite  song by Marlene is Wenn Die Beste Freundin (Marlene Dietrich, Oskar Karlweis, Margo Lion) (1928)  then a close second is Ich Hab’ Noch Einen Koffer In Berlin (1954)  then Ich bin von Kopf bis Fuß auf Liebe eingestellt (1930)

She has a style that no one today can touch, a classy elegance – it’s not the same now perhaps it was managed well by the movie companies the allure of mystery about her (it certainly was for Marlene, her privacy was very important to her)

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Death and Butterscotch

I had a terrible nights sleep last night, Yep I felt like I was in that vortex ….I remember 5 and 6 am, worrying about work, people I love, life, my car, stupid stuff … Being awake in the dead of night with a couple of foxes for company, staring out the window, looking at the waxing moon. I woke up knackered (after 2 hours sleep)  yet full of ideas for this post and I’m sitting her writing this with wet hair as I needed a bath to wake me up as I was such a zombie.

Ideas about death, love, waiting, patience, hurt, loss all the things we just don’t want to deal with ….a bit morbid maybe it’s the lack off sleep my brain is wired differently today but out it must come.

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The Moon

Crescent Moon in Gemini tonight ~ April 17th 2010

I love the moon and can gaze at it a lot at its different stages through the new moon back to the dark moon

It has always fascinated me since I was a child and since I started looking at it in more depth through the symbolism of astrology and Goddess imagery, it becomes more intriguing.

There was a solar eclipse on the morning of May 20th I was born during the darkness at 4am the following morning, though my mother said I never wanted to be born, they literally pulled me out with forceps. I was born with long black hair, a black eye (from the forceps) and a yellow face (from jaundice)… beautiful I was – stubborn Taurean Continue reading

Spring – Taking care of yourself

Lillies in my Kitchen ~ April 2010

I love lillies always have, maybe it’s the fragrance that hangs around my house for days, I can smell the aroma the minute I walk through the front door, it’s very welcoming.

Today has been rather lovely, I spent a lot of it under a tree reading a biography on Rimbaud by Graham Robb in the sunshine, quietly enjoying the first real stirrings of Spring.

I also love riding my lovely bike ( a Marin Point Reyes) as to get to this lovely secluded spot away from noise and people I needed to ride there, so I gathered up the essentials (a book,  a picnic of sandwiches (which funnily enough even had cucumbers in it… how delightfully British of me…) , juice, yogurt and ginger cake)

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Back In The Saddle – To Be 6 Years Old Again

300zx Twin Turbo Manual

I see my zed like a big gallant horse and a spaceship all rolled into one

Ok I’m now about 6 years old and loving it!

Life has enough to trip you up, test you and drive you nuts, there ain’t nothing wrong with focusing on the postive and the fun stuff.

I’m all for world peace, fighting injustice and hypocrisy – who in their right mind wouldn’t be?

There is also time for good things – the stuff that makes us chuckle and grin from ear to ear, the people who make our hearts flutter and the peace we all have within us to help make a difference to the world

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Appreciation Today

For a wonderful lady

PJ Harvey

Polly Jean, has been a companion on the road of music with me since her album Dry (in the early 90’s) The woman’s vocal range and her emotional strength that come from her songs is mind blowing. Her Wiki

I’ve been playing her most of the day, since I managed to to get out of bed… (going to bed at dawn didn’t help) and having my fab Squeezebox with all her songs on it makes it so much easier and I can get on with other things too. Continue reading

Hell Yeah!

Happiness is utterly crucial here, I just know what doesn’t serve me …
Life is about living; being who you are and staying true to yourself..always

Even when it means you have to put “your hoof” down… (Taurus)

Feeling good is paramount, moping doesn’t solve anything; it just takes longer to get out of the shit! Continue reading

Hmmmm… it’s 12.30am and I’m thinking of Cupcakes

I baked these – Vegan Cupcakes

Hmmmm…. I haven’t slept properly for weeks and all this blogging is not helping,

I’m officially a night owl

It doesn’t matter what I do I lie in bed wide awake, I used to sleep so well too, maybe I need some company hmmmm…. or just a few cupcakes?

Inspired to…

Well there isn’t words I can really describe how I feel about her, I’m sure they’ll come eventually, I’m slow to love, really love and I take my time with how I feel and deal with things.

She has been gone for over 3 years now, even though I’m fine about it most of the time, it still gets me, when I least expect it.

Stupid stuff, like watching a movie – you don’t realise the extent of how deep your feelings go until they’ve actually left the bloody planet. How annoying is that?

I’ve never been really good with parent stuff, it just made me feel uncomfortable and so I moved 350 miles away – just to make sure.

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